Amazing is He

I was looking at my blog today and scrolled down to read the Verse of the Day. ( John 3:20-21) It was amazing for me to read it because I had been thinking about the past year. How far I have come in my on walk with God and how far I have come from separating myself from some of the misdeeds of the past year. God was really showing me thru that verse the evil will be exposed. So much evil has been done over this past year. I sometimes wondered how I would ever get through the pain and wrongness that was done. I am not asking for a pity party, I don't need company in that. I had enough crying sessions to last me a lifetime. I just know that when I started to really feel better was when I finally gave it all to God. He took it from me, He allowed for me to forgive so many people that this time last year, I wouldn't have cared to ever speak to again. (Some I have not, but I know that is because it is God's plan for now.) He keeps showing me in scripture and in small voices I hear in my heart that it is all going to be ok. I have also found that I truly have a friend in my brother. He has talked so much to me about things and has tried to be nonjudgemental about people. He has told me that he supports me 100%. That means more than anything. I can't believe that last year I was allowing people who obviously felt the need to lie and embellish truths for their own benefit (out of their own guilt) caused me to seek out a divorce lawyer. Caused me to want to leave my husband, even though he knew the truth. James and I didn't and still don't have a "perfect" marriage, ( I don't know of anyone who does) but he is my best friend. He knows me better than anyone. He got tore down himself. He tried hard to be what everybody wanted at the time and by his own admission, felt that due to my strengths, he didn't have to stand so solidly beside me. He felt that I would be ok because he and I knew the truths about our lives, our family and all that was going on. He thought I would ignore people like I can do. He didn't know that I really needed him. He was so blinded by his own grief he didn't see me. Thankfully, that has all changed. We are both thankful for God showing us that He was there and by that, He has brought us closer together and tighter than ever. No one will ever be able to do to one that the other doesn't feel or see. I look back over the year and shake my head. I just don't know why I ever let people bother me. I refuse to ever let that happen again.

I have a lot to be thankful for. I have a God who knows the truth, (all the time), I have a husband who only puts God before me, I have kids who love me more than I ever knew. I have some really awesome friends (Kelley, Debra, Susan, Allyson, Jenn, Sandra T. and Cheryl) who would cross the ocean for me and always have my back. Amazing Godparents, who helped raise me to be the person I am. I am thankful for all of my family. I thank God everyday for allowing me to come thru this. He strengthens us in our trials. (2 Timothy 4:17)

Amazing is He.